Hello lovely ones.
Like some of you might know I’ve been unemployed for half of an eternity, or to be more exact almost three years. I don’t think I need to tell you that I feel pretty done with it by now. The problem is that I’m not done with it, because until I’ve learned to deal with my anxiety problem I won’t be able to get a job. But right now I really hate not having a job even more than I hate my anxiety.
It’s like I know that I can’t get a job right now. I really, really know that. I know that I need to focus on getting better and that my mental health comes first. But lately this not having a job thing have been on my mind all the time.
I really hate not having a job because being at home all day, not really having anything to do isn’t as fun as it might sound. This blog is the only thing that don’t just feel like a waste of time. Apart from that I just watch Netflix or talk to the cats.
I really hate not having a job because I haven’t had an income of my own for almost three years and I tired of living of Mr. A and my parents, and since Mr. A is in school we are pretty much always low on money.
I really hate not having a job because I’m terrified how this big gap will look at my CV ones I start applying for jobs again. I mean I have literally no idea what I will say when they ask about it. It’s like how should I be able to talk about what I’ve been through without being seen as a risk.
I really hate not having a job and I actually thought about start applying for jobs just so that I could have something to blog about. Because yes, that’s actually how boring my life is at the moment.
But most of all I really hate not having a job because it feel like I’m wasting my life away and that time is running away from me. I feel like I had my chance and now I’ve lost it and that I might never have a job ever again. And I feel like a loser even though I know I’m not a loser and I really hate feeling like this.
Have you ever been without work for a long period of time? Got any tips for me on how to deal with it?